First Phone Guide

Is Your Child Ready for a Smartphone?

Table of Contents What the Experts Say p. 3 Keeping Connected Kids Safe p. 5 3 Questions Parents Should Ask Before Purchasing p. 7 The Pros & Cons of Kids Using Smartphones p. 8 Smart Rules for Smartphone Users p. 10 6 Things to Consider Before Getting Your Child a Smartphone p. 11 Smartphone Family Contract p. 14 p. 2

What the Experts Say If you’re like us, you’ve read all the parenting articles you can 昀椀nd about kids and smart- phones – but you still have questions. Like, what age is appropriate for my child to have their own phone? Or, is it safe to give my middle schooler a smartphone? Here at Zift, we’ve compiled information from parents and parenting experts to help guide you through this journey, to help you determine when your child is ready for their first phone. First things first: you need to know that there is no “right” age for a child to get their first smartphone. However, there are many factors that may influence your decision to hand your kid a cell phone and those could include: Need for communication before, during or after school The ability for your child to contact you in an emergency (or vice versa) Assistance in coordinating pick-up/drop-o昀昀 details for school or extracurricular events Extended trips, summer camp or overnight stays at friends’ houses Weekend or joint custody with a co-parent The ability for kids to talk to school friends without borrowing your own device Consider this –the National Center for Health Statistics reports that 50.8% of today’s households don’t have a landline and rely on individual cell phones. p. 3

50.8% 70% of households don’t have a of all adults aged 25-34 landline, but have at least 1 were living in wireless-only cellular device. households. 60% of kids Percentage of adults 50% of adults and children living in households with only wireless phones. 2003 2004 2006 2007 2009 2010 2012 2013 2015 2016 There are numerous studies and parenting reports suggesting appropriate ages for smartphone ownership. The general consensus and average age is roughly 10 years old. 39% 11% 10.3 yrs of kids get a social got a social media ac- is the average age for media account at 11.4 count when they were a child getting their 昀椀rst years old. younger than 10. smartphone. Source: In昀氀uence Central study, Kids & Tech: The Evolution of Today’s Digital Natives, 2016. p. 4

Keeping Connected Kids Safe As a parent, you weigh the bene昀椀ts and dan- gers of things in your child’s life every day. From buckling your child’s seatbelt to strang- er danger, it’s a 24/7 job to keep keeps safe day in and day out. There are lots of things to be concerned about Approximately 1 in 7 youth when it comes to kids and smartphones, too. internet users received Undeniably, there are plenty of bene昀椀ts for being able to contact your child whenever unwanted sexual solicitation. you need to, but there are also dangers to consider before giving your child access to a Source: U.S. Department of Justice and NSOPW, National Sex smartphone. O昀昀ender Public Website “Parents often cite the bene昀椀ts of giving their child a cell phone, but our research suggests that giving young children these devices may have unforeseen risks as well,” said Elizabeth K. Englander, Ph.D., a professor of psycholo- gy at Bridgewater State University in Bridge- water, Mass. Stranger Danger. The internet has given us a great many things, but it also has a very real dark side. Online predators have access to kids in more ways than ever before and impersonating or as- suming the role of a friend or trusted mentor can put kids in danger. Cyberbullying. 3rd and 4th graders Cyberbullying is a big problem in and out of schools today and kids are feeling those ef- who have a cell phone fects emotionally, psychologically and phys- ically. Your child’s access to a smartphone are more likely to be directly increases their chances of being cy- cyberbullied. berbullied. In fact, the American Academy of Pediatrics noted that third and fourth grad- Source: American Academy of Pediatrics, Cell ers who own a cell phone are more likely to Phone Ownership and Cyberbullying in 8-11 be cyberbullied. Year Olds: New Research, 2017 For more resources, read our Cyberbullying Guide for Parents. p. 5

Sexting. Sexting is a common concern for parents of teens and tweens and having access to a smartphone gives kids 54% of teens the ability to snap an inappropriate photo and send it before they fully understand the consequences of have engaged in their actions. A study by Drexel University found that sexting roughly 54% of teen have engaged in sexting. Source: Drexel University Need tips to broach this subject with your kids? Read How to Talk to Your Kids About Sexting. If you’re concerned about your child sexting, check out Detoured: The Anti-Sexting App. Detoured’s QuickScan technology analyzes images for nudity and quarantines them on your child’s phone to prevent them from being dispersed. p. 6

3 Questions Parents Should Ask Before Purchasing With all the 昀氀exible plans and multi-phone discounts available today, it may be easy and af- fordable to add a smartphone line for your child. However, there are some important issues you should consider before making this decision. Here are some key questions to ask yourself before buying your child a smartphone: Is it worth the added expense? If you already have an unlimited phone plan, this may not be a big problem. Even so, you should consider how frequently your child may access high bandwidth data, like YouTube videos, while using their phone. You may also want additional phone insurance to protect the device should your child damage, misplace or lose it. Is your child responsible enough? Your child’s ability to follow rules will greatly impact whether or not you can trust them with a phone. They need to understand how to take care of their phone, how to keep it charged, that they can’t lend it to anyone, how to respect the privacy of others online, and how to use it responsibly. Is your child mature enough to keep out of trouble with their phone? Does the school allow phones on campus? Some schools don’t allow them, so be sure you ask that question before making a pur- chase. In addition, you’ll have to be aware of the school’s technology policies and make sure your child can abide by those regulations. p. 7

The Pros & Cons of Kids Using Smartphones Once you’ve gotten through the key questions, you now need to consider the pros and cons of placing a phone into your child’s hands on a regular basis. Here are the advantages and disadvan- tages of giving your child a smartphone: ADVANTAGES Safety advantages. A phone can be a great safety device in case your child gets lost, stranded or hurt. Be sure to program it with your personal phone numbers, as well as those of trusted adults who can keep them safe, like 911, emergency contacts and teachers/aides, if they use the phone at school and during extracurricular activities. Connecting with friends. Some children have difficulty making and connecting with friends and don’t yet have access to email or understand it well. Most kids, however, can use a phone early on. A smartphone can help your child stay in touch with friends outside of school and that makes friendships easier if many of their peers also have phones - and they won’t feel left out! Skill building. Providing your child a phone is a great way to start teaching them proper social skills, like when it’s inappropriate to use a phone, when it’s okay to take photos, how to ask per- mission before sharing images, etc. In addition, a smartphone can help them research something they don’t understand, access the day’s weather or navigate somewhere. Flexible safety tools. Today, there are lots of tools to safeguard your child’s smart phone. From safety blocking tools to phone tracking, you can set up the phone to meet your child’s needs and keep them safe from everything else. Or, you can purchase a phone with limited capabilities, such as one that can only call certain phone numbers. It’s up to you to take the initiative to select the right device and program it properly. Be sure to enable parental controls for your child’s phone, too. p. 8

DISADVANTAGES Too much screen time. When your child has access to a phone all day, you can expect a signi昀椀cant increase in their screen time. The one important thing you can do is set rules and provide tools to limit their exposure and teach them when to turn it o昀昀. Even Steve Jobs limited his chil- dren’s time on the phone, setting rules such as “no technology at the dinner table”. Exposure to danger. Internet stranger danger, exposure to pornography and cyberbullying are topics you may not be ready to deal with, but they could threaten your child if you’re not careful. It’s essential to teach your child the ins and outs of phone safety, the dangers of bullying and decide whether your child is mature enough for social media. Distraction. At school, places of worship, sporting events or live shows, the phone can take your child’s attention from where it needs to be. Even if you block games or online access, they can still become engrossed in photos, calls or other apps you wouldn’t necessarily think much about. If you think having a phone in their pocket will easily distract your child, they may not be ready for a smartphone. Vulnerability to security issues. As a parent, you are fully responsible for handing that phone to your child. Be aware of security issues that can plague their phone, like viruses and hacks, credit cards in mem- ory and apps that are not updated that could be vulnerable. While you should teach your child these responsibilities, you also need to be responsible for those things while they are learning. A phone can provide kids an easy way to keep in touch with trusted family members and it can also improve social skills among their peers. Weigh all the pros and cons before you make this decision for your child. p. 9

Smart Rules for Smartphone Users When preparing your child for the world of constant communication and internet connec- tivity, walk them through what’s acceptable and appropriate for smartphone users. This will guide your expectations of their smartphone use and also introduce them to the world of responsible digital citizenship and etiquette. Since your child may not know or understand these rules yet, have a conversation with them when handing over their new device. Below are a few tips for new phone users that can help. Tips for First Time Phone Users. 1. Understand what your smartphone should be used for. This is a tool for mom, dad and other parent-approved, trusted contacts to get in touch with you. This means that answering their calls or texts are important and not to be ignored. 2. Having a smartphone is a privilege. Just because your friends have one, doesn’t mean that you auto- matically are entitled to one. It also means that your continued use of the phone is based on your behavior and responsible use. 3. Don’t use smartphones in o昀昀-limits areas. This could be your sibling’s bedroom, the bathroom, church, movie theaters, or any other places that cell phones are a no-no. 4. Put them away during meals. Breakfast, lunch and dinner are times to connect with friends and family, not to be on your phone. 5. Don’t use your phone during quiet hours. This could be late at night or early morning, but a good rule of thumb is that the hours between bedtime and breakfast are o昀昀-limits for calls, texts or other phone functions. 6. Parents must approve all contacts. Before giving out your phone number or adding a contact, make sure your parents have approved that person. 7. Parents must approve all apps. Mom and dad also have the 昀椀nal say for what’s downloaded onto your phone and which apps and websites you’re able to use. p. 10

6 Things to Consider Before Getting Your Child a Smartphone You likely see periodic calls for help from your friends on social media, asking what age everyone allows their children to have a cell phone. Don’t worry – it’s a common question. If you scour the internet for assistance in making this monumental technological decision, you’ll 昀椀nd a bevy of contradict- ing studies; one study suggests that the average age a child takes ownership of a smartphone is six, while another study states the age of twelve. Then, factoring in a study by In昀氀uence Central, which re- ports that the average age for 昀椀rst time smartphone ownership is ten years old. Only you can accurately gauge when your child is ready for their own smartphone. 37% 41% of Dads are likely to of Moms are likely to give their child a give their child a phone in elementary phone in middle school school p. 11

HOW TO KNOW IF YOUR CHILD IS READY FOR A CELL PHONE 1. Pair with Your Partner. A study conducted by Sprint and Techlicious showed 37% of dads are likely to give their child a smartphone in elementary school, while 41% of moms are more likely to give their child a smartphone in middle school. Make sure that you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to issuing your kiddo a smartphone. A united front will go a long way with enforcing phone rules. 2. Age is But a Number. You are the best gauge of your child’s ability to handle the re- sponsibility of phone ownership. Smartphones are an expensive piece of equipment, best issued when your child can understand the weight of such responsibility. Considering that the iPhone is the most popular smartphone among teens, and the average cost for an iPhone is right around $700, handing over such an expensive piece of equipment to a child does not come lightly for the average family. If you have a child who doesn’t yet understand the value of a smartphone, is often misplacing and losing items, or is too young to take care of their things, you may want to wait a little before making a smartphone purchase. Instead, work with them to un- derstand the value of things, and be more mindful of their pos- sessions. If you feel strongly about your child’s need for a phone, purchase an inexpensive cell phone for emergency use, and have them work their way up from there. 3. Peer Factor. If your child is telling you that all of their friends have smart- phones, do some investigative work. Ask some of your child’s friends parents if they have phones, to gauge how many do, in- deed have their own smartphones. While you’re asking, also ask how they are monitoring usage, and what ground rules they’ve put into place. 4. Need or Desire. At the same time your child is asking for a smartphone, claiming that all of their friends have one, gauge if there really is a need for a smartphone, or if your child’s request is out of a desire to be like their friends. If your child is involved in after school activities, or goes to after school care, you may see a need for you to be able to contact your child directly with a smartphone. p. 12

5. Set Internet Rules. While you’ve likely discussed the importance of keeping personal information o昀昀 social media, it’s especially important when your child begins using a smart- phone. If you’re comfortable with your child frequenting social media sites, open the lines of communication so they’ll feel comfortable enough to notify you of any threatening situations. Most importantly, establish basic rules about behavior online and on social media. 6. Sign a Contract. You’ve discussed your expectations and talked about the great responsibility that comes along with owning a smartphone, now put everything in writing. Weight your words by drafting a contract outlining the rules for smartphone conduct, and put the consequences to those rules into writing. Having a contract with your child holds both of you accountable; if your child breaks a smartphone rule, they know the repercussions and you know the consequence to dole out. As you would instruct your kiddo, the best course of action is to use your best judgement when it comes to buying your child a smartphone. If your gut instinct tells you that your child isn’t ready, or that an expensive piece of technology is likely to be lost, then wait a few months and revisit. p. 13

Congrats On Getting Your First Cell Phone! It’s a great tool for communication, but it does come with great responsibility. Our rules for using this phone are below: Phone Number: _______________ Phone Password: ________________ You Agree To: Only add contacts of friends and family members. Mom & Dad’s number should also be saved as ICE contacts. (In Case of Emergency) This phone is only to be used for __________________________________. Not download/use any apps without permission 昀椀rst. Use the phone between the hours of _________ and ___________ only. ________________________ rooms are o昀昀-limits for using my phone. Ask permission before purchasing anything online. Charge overnight in _______________. Not use during breakfast, lunch or dinner. Not share any personal information or photos of myself or others without approval. Use your best judgment when giving out this phone number. Turn o昀昀 location tagging & will only tag yourself in places if accompanied and approved by a trusted adult. Take care of this phone by keeping it clean and safe. We Agree To: Purchase a case and screen protector for the phone. Review all privacy settings & any app accounts downloaded on it. Keep the phone password. Review phone insurance needs. Set an example by not texting and driving. Teach good phone etiquette and lead by example. _________________________ ___________________________ _________________________ ___________________________ (Parent/Guardian Signature) (Child Signature) p. 14